Welcome to the crossroads of pop culture, a place where anyone and anything that has ever been showcased on a screen exists in its own realm. There have been thousands of stories that have been told over the course of human history, ranging from genetically engineered dinosaurs on an island, to an eccentric billionaire who likes to dress up as a flying rodent, to a former Boston Red Sox pitcher starting a new career as a bartender. All of these stories have a dimension in which they fit, and this is the epicenter to which they all collide.
The Chancellor/Supreme Leader of this multiverse is the kindest, most intelligent, greatest human being to ever walk the face of the Earth. The foxy freak of nature himself, a revelation to mankind, a glitterbomb of glory, the one, the only, Keanu Reeves. It is he, who we should all look to be like in our own personal lives.
This morning, however, someone attempted to assassinate the one and only Keanu. Luckily, he was able to escape, because bullets don’t really affect him. Have you ever seen The Matrix? While the all-powerful Keanu is safe, the local authorities are on the lookout for his assailant. Rumor has it that this person is the most evil individual in the entire known multiverse. This conniving, bloodthirsty, savage could very well be the inspiration behind the film, The Exorcist, uses the word moist at least once a paragraph, and has been caught multiple times double-dipping a chip.
It is your job to track down this heinous creature and bring them to justice, where they will be sentenced to rot in a prison cell watching the final season of Game of Thrones on a big screen with the band Imagine Dragons playing on repeat in the background. Let’s face it, that’s the closest thing to Hell there ever will be.
To catch the suspect, you must do the following:
Best of luck on your journey through the multiverse. Here are the directions that will take you to the first location.
A1A Carwash
Adenville, Utah
Alderaan
Alphabetrium
Arboles Mentirosos
Arkham Asylum
Arlington Road
Arrakeen
Ashton, Alabama
Aspen, Colorado
Average Joe’s Gymnasium
Barksdale’s Boxing
Bartertown
Basin City
Bates Motel
Bedrock
Belvedere, Ohio
Biff’s Casino
Big Kahuna Burger
Big Rock Candy Mountain
Bird World
Blanketsburg
Blips and Chitz
Bluffington
Bluth’s Original Frozen Banana Stand
Bob’s Burgers
Bo Ling Chop Suey Palace
Braavos
Bulletfarm
Cafe Nervosa
Callister, INC.
Camden County
Camelot
Candyland Ranch
Cannibal Cove
Castle Rock, Maine
Casterly Rock
Central Perk
Chaos Theater
Charming, California
Cheers
Chernobyl
Chez Quis
Chubbie’s Famous
Chokey Chicken
Chotchkie’s
Chump’s Rusty Bucket
Citadel
City College
City of Delusion
Cloud City
Club Obi-Wan
Cob
Columbus
Cooper Station
Continental Hotel
Coruscant
Crab Shack
Cromulon Dimension
Cydonia
Dagobah
Dantooine
Deadwood
Del Boca Vista
Delos
Denton, Ohio
Derkaderkastan
Dimension C-
Dreamatorium
Dorian
Dowisetrepla District
Duckberg
Dunder-Mifflin
Dwarf Terrace-
East Baltimore
Eastasia
Ebbing, Missouri
Edward Tilghman Middle School
Endor
Fargo, North Dakota
Farhampton Inn
Fiji
Flanahan’s Hole
Florin
Fluffyb
Fhloston’s Paradise
Fortress of Solitude
Fratelli’s
Freddy’s BBQ
Free Country, USA
Froopyland
Frostbite Falls
Gargantua
Gary’s Olde Be Tavern
Gas Town
Gazorpazorp
Gazzola’s
Gear World
Genius Grove
Giddy Up’s
Gilligan’s Island
Globogym
Gobbler’s Knob
Goliath National Bank
Gongman City
Good Burger
Gotham City Police Department
Greasy Grandma World
Greendale Community College
Gruber Pharmaceuticals
Guilder
Gus’s Galaxy Grill
Gusteau’s
Halloween
Harry Herpson High School
Hamish, Hamish, & Hamlin
Hamlin, Hamlin, & McGill
Hawthorne Wipes
Hell
Highgarden
Hill Valley Courthouse
Honker Burger
Hoser Hut
Hotel California
Hoth
Hudson University
Isla Nubar
Isle of Dogs
J. Peterman Catalogs
J Zeta
Jack Rabbit Slims
Jakku
Jarden, Texas
Joe’s Fruit Shop
Josette, Louisiana
0J.P. Wynne High School
Julie’s House
Kadie’s Club Pecos
Kenny Roger’s Roasters
Kessel
King’s Landing
Klendathu
Kokomo
Korova Milk Bar
Krelboyne
Kronos
Kruger Industrial Smoothing
Krypton
KVWN
L Street
Lacuna
La Louisiane
La Ratatouille
Lawndale High
Lazer Base
Lee’s Palace
LeGamaar Cinema
Little Rock
Liquid State
Lone Pine Mall
Loompaland
Los Pollos Hermanos
Lusty Leopard
MacLaren’s Pub
Madrigal Electromotive
Mapleton, New York
Margaritaville
Maycomb, Alabama
McGinty’s
Mendl’s Bakery
Mega-City
Metrocity
Miami Metro
Microverse
Middle Earth
Millennium Falcon
Miniverse
Minnesota State University
Moe’s Tavern
Monk’s Cafe
Morty’s Steakhouse
Mos Eisley Cantina
Moulin Rouge
Mr. Smiley’s
Mt. Olympus
Muscle Museum
Nambutu
Nebraska
Nibia
Nicholson, Hewitt, & West
Nilbog
Ogdenville
Orbit City
Oto Island
Otter Bay
Paper Street Soap Company
Parblesnops
Peaceful Pines
Pencil’s and Such
Pendant Publishing
Pennbrook University
Petoria
Pizza Planet
Plains of Silence
Planet Greendalia
Planet Squanch
Play Now
Pluto
Princeton-Plainsboro Teaching Hospital
Poor Richard’s
Puzzles
Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania
Purgatory
Quahog
Quark’s
Ranjit’s Taxi
Riverrun
Romanovia
Rushmore Preparatory School
Sacred Heart Hospital
San Fransokyo
Sandbox
Sandford
Sea Haven Island
Scranton, Pennsylvania
Screaming Sun Earth
Shady Side
Shawshank State Penitentiary
Shinjitsu
Shutter Island
Silvio’s Barbershop
Skeepers
Skull Island
Sky Temple
Skynet
South Central Louisiana State University
South Park
Spahn Ranch
Splitsville
Spoonerville
Statler and Waldorf
Supermassive Black Hole
Swallow Falls
Tallahassee
Ten Forward
The Arcadian
The Beehive
The Bermuda Triangle
The Bog
The Citadel of Ricks
The Crab Shed
The Cross Hands
The Death Star
The First Post
The Good Companions
The Grand Budapest Hotel
The Green Place
The High Table
The Hole in the Wall
The Intersection
The King’s Head
The Matrix
The Mermaid
The North
The Oasis
The Old Familiar
The Overlook Hotel
The Ninth Circle
The Pit of Despair
The Promethean Nebula
The Rockit
The Rusty Anchor
The Tip Top Cafe
The Towers
The Trusty Servant
The Two-Headed Dog
The Void
The World’s End
Thugz Mansion
Tiniverse
Tombstone
Top of the Muffin to You
Bsville
Trash Island
Trogdorville
Twin Pine’s Mall
Two Mills
Unity’s Planet
Valantis
Valhalla
Vamonos Pest Control
Venzenulon
Venusville
Victoria, Australia
Vulcan
Vulgaria
Vulvalini Encampment
Wallace’s Apartment
Waponi Woo
Wastelands
Wellsville
Wesleyan University
West Baltimore
Westeros
Westb
Whoville
Winchester Tavern
Winterfell
Wichita
Wide News
WNYX
WKRP
Yuma, Arizona
Yunkai
Zen Nail Salon